It was Iraq, 2006. Our mission on this sultry August night was to fly through the country to deliver much-needed supply. As we flew around the outskirts of Baghdad, nothing seemed out of place or abnormal in any way. Little did I know that my life was about to change. A bright flash, a stream of smoke, and a scream so loud that I could understand it over the sound of the running engines from seventy feet away is burned into my memory. The airplane flutters and dives to avoid the incoming rocket that had just been shot. We manage to barely escape as the rocket flies just past our wing tip and explodes a thousand feet above us. We had survived. That was the first time I had ever been shot at while flying. Sadly, it would not be my last. I am still dealing with those events during my deployments to Iraq and Afghanistan. As with many veterans, the effects of those actions did not play a factor that night, or for the rest of my rotation. Instead, similar memories reared their ugly heads after I had returned home even though I was safe with family.
This situation is not uncommon at all with modern veterans. Our brains compartmentalize the problems and traumatic events to enable us to survive some of the worst conditions imaginable. Then when we can decompress from the stress and calm ourselves, the problems arise because they have not been properly dealt with. The problems seem so great and insurmountable that it leads us to contemplate the ultimate solution: suicide.
It has been almost a decade since the United States engaged in combat in Iraq and Afghanistan. During that decade, the suicide rates among service members and veterans has risen sharply (Katel, 2011). This has lead to criticism of the military and leadership. As a result, the military branches are increasing their suicide prevention programs. The Department of Veterans Affairs (VA) has increased their mental health support by more than 6,000 workers and offers toll free hotlines. While it may lessen the number of suicides slightly, it is like putting a bandage over a gaping wound. According to the most recent statistics, the suicide rates of Iraq/Afghanistan veterans under VA care stood at 38 per 100,000 members in 2008. This translates to roughly two-and-a-half times the military’s suicide rate of 15.8 per 100,000 members. (Katel, 2011).
The longstanding thought that most veterans agree upon is on the basis that the VA is a bureaucratic, slow system. This is leading to veterans not getting their treatment in timely manners. I, personally, have been waiting over six months to be seen for an initial disability claim that is only covering bodily harm. I can only imagine how hard it is for members with life threatening mental issues to received treatment that could potentially save them from themselves. These practices of waiting to help those brave Americans that risk everything for everyone else is utterly sickening. The senate has even launched a special committee to oversee the Department of Veterans Affairs and try to fix the problem. Sadly, there has been no improvements made, only excuses. I hope that as the wars end and troops are returning home in the thousands, the VA will have the time and effort needed to fix these atrocities.
After returning from my first rotation in Iraq, things just did not seem to click. I felt awkward around my friends and family, I had a terrible time sleeping, and I fought constantly with my ex-wife. My mood swings were so bad that I did not even want to be around myself. I was depressed and on the verge of harming myself. Luckily, I had the support around to help me get through this rough patch. That cannot be said for all service members, and the results are catastrophic. I am still dealing in many ways with the events of my deployments, but I have reason for hope and am getting better. I wish the same for all veterans.
Katel, P. (2011, September 23). Military suicides. Retrieved on October 21, 2011 from the CQ Researcher database.
(a)
(b)
(c) 
Above: (a) a chart depicting the suicide rates of veterans vs. active military, (b) the demographics of military suicides, and (c) a military suicide prevention poster
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